6/25/10

Matthew 10:23-25


Ok, I'm done making juvenile ads, and back to reading “Matthew” which is about Jesus, not Matthew.

10:23 threw me. After blogging the whole Koran I knew better than to go look something up, but he keeps calling himself the 'Son of Man, and it bugs me. What's wrong with “me”, like a normal person?
Other places he's the 'Son of God'. I realize he has some issues with paternity, but still. So against my better judgment I looked it up, and guess what? It means whatever you want, depending on who you ask. No surprise there.

I notice other people call him SOG (The debbil did in 4:3 and 4:6, and the pig-hating demons in 8:29), but he calls himself SOM (9:6, 10:23). From what I gather S.O.M. is a kind of old word for “dude”, since everybody's a son of man, right? For these guys everybody's a son of god too, (unless you're a daughter of god, you know, one of those things vaginas have attached, no point mentioning those) S.O.G. is like an old word for “boss”, sort of respectful-like.
(*OpenOffice thinks that should be 'vaginae'. Wtf.)

We could revive these terms: “Hey Son of God, Son of Man finished your report and faxed it to Son of God. What does Son of God want Son of Man to do with it?” On second thought—Pronouns!

It works way better. Look
10:23 ... I tell you the truth, you will not finish going through the cities of Israel before the Son of Man I come s.
Now see, nothing hard about that at all, especially When you Look at the Context(TM). He was sending all the twelve apostles out and staying behind with the two Marys; hardly controversial he'd get his rocks off before they finished their grand tour.

The next two lines say a student can't be better'n their teacher (Yeah, Einstein, we're looking at you) and promotes collective guilt, (hang me now, one of my ancestors was a horse rustler). It's customary to ignore the bad parts, though, so I won't say anything about those like I just did.

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