God Will Go To Hell

This first chapter (75) of the Middle Meccan period is all devoted to Judgment day. The pagans never had anything like that, so this whole idea of a last day, resurrection and afterlife is all stolen from the Christians, apparently. They should have copyrighted that shit.
So what happens on that last day? Well, the sun and moon will be joined together (v9). Whatever that means, it doesn't sound good. Some peeps will be happy—they get two lines, and some will not be—they get eleven lines. Predictably, Mo only spends 15 percent of his speechifying on good stuff, and 85% on punishments, working himself up. Are we seeing the trend here? He seems to get his rocks off with these last two lines.
34. Alas the woe for you, alas!
35. Alas, the woe for you!
A wierd thing about this chapter is that v16-19 only make sense if you look at them as an interruption, Of course there is absolutely nothing to indicate this, except that they don't make sense otherwise. Have you ever been talking to someone wearing a headset and saying things into the phone while they are talking to you? Does it seem rude and inconsiderate? Well, that's god for you: these lines are supposed to be an aside from god to Mo, telling him not to rush through this shit, to take his time and remember it. Supposedly because it was a new thing and he hadn't got the hang of it yet. Dude, this is the 29th one! Let's face it, they know fuck all about what order chapters these go in.
Chapter 104, The Slanderers, spends 6 of its 9 verses saying how awful hell is, which is where slanderers will go. Since god says Jews are apes and pigs, (7:166, 2:65, 5:60...), a clearly "false and defamatory statement" it looks like god will go to hell. There's no question these guys will, or these guys, or this guy.

That's the first two revelations of the Middle Mecca Period. We're heading into some serious preachin' ahead. Next up: Chapter 77, The Emissaries.

No comments: