Adam and Yves

Chapter 2:30-40 tell the story of Adam and Iblis. Again. I have never gotten the point of this. God tells Adam the names of everything, then he asks the angels the names. Being angels they're all suckuppy and just say they don't know, they don't say “How the fuck should we know? It wasn't us you just got done telling, dumbass, it was Adam” like you or I would. Already this is going off the rails. Then he tells Adam to tell them the names, and when he's done god turns to the angels and rubs it in:

"(2:33)Did I not tell you that I know the unknown of the heavens and the earth,”

What's up with that? Sounds like a snotty little third grade bully saying “See how smart I am; nyah nyah na-nyaa nyah”. Then he tells the angels to bow down to Adam. WTF, Why? Because he told him and not them? That sucks dromedary dick.

Muslims tell me it's a parable: Adam = humans; Angels = every other critter there is; humans are the master race because they know more. I'm not buying that. It's the same old same old; every religion's gotta be better than everybody else. In fact, that's about ALL religions do, and then go around “having dominion.” If you won't bow down they go all Old Testament on your ass. Three cheers for Iblis for being the only one with the nads to stand up for himself.

This happened before the Garden of Eden, unless you wanna pull that silly 'then' = 'moreover' bit. The koran says

(31) Then He gave Adam knowledge of the nature and reality of all things and everything

In that case, what's the point of the Tree of Knowledge? He already knew everything, including whether it was a good idea to eat the apple. He ate it so it must have been the right thing to do. God was saying “Don't eat this or you will learn what you already know.” Sure, that makes sense.

Adam wasn't alone in that garden, either. God told him “Both you and your spouse go.” Spouse, spouse, what was that name again? Steena, Steve, something like that ... oh yeah, Yves, that was it.

(* note: That French name, 'Yves', is pronounced exactly like 'Eve'. In case you dint know. )

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