Here we are reading the koran in order, at Sura 17 we're nearly halfway through it and we come to the famous story of Mo's Night Journey (this is more of verse 1). Why is this story not in the koran, when it's so famous and important?
Lemme see if I've got this straight. The angel Gabriel appeared and talked to Mo. It goes in the Koran if Mo said Gabriel said God said it. It goes in the Hadith if somebody else said Mo said Gabriel said God said it. So in this story, Mo said God said it—the only time god ever spoke directly to him, and HE LEFT IT OUT OF THE KORAN! Sure, that makes sense.
Yeah, Ok, so moving right along, Mo goes up to heaven, to the pearly gates, and Saint Peter asks him .... Oops, wrong myth. But yeah, he goes to heaven and somebody asked: Who's there? Who's he bringing in? Does he have an appointment? Then, once god's security team has checked them out, they let him into heaven's first floor. On each floor he meets a different person from the bible—Adam, Joseph, Moses—who gives him props. At the top it's “7th floor, Abraham, Lotus tree, God.”
At least, that's one version. This story is from al-Iman, 75:1:309. But in 313 he says “He (the Holy Prophet) mentioned that he found in the heavens Adam, Idris, Jesus, Moses and Abraham (may peace be on all of them), but he did not ascertain as to the nature of their abodes except that he had found Adam in the lowest heaven and Abraham in the sixth heaven.” So which is it? Did he ascertain them like he did in 309 or is 313 telling the truth? For that matter, I'd like the witness to revisit the opening scene and tell the court again just exactly where this purported “vision” is supposed to have occurred. Will the court stenographer please read back the witness's earlier statements?
313 : The roof of my house was cleft when I was in Mecca and Gabriel descended ...
312: Three beings (angels) came to him in the mosque of the Ka'bah, while he was sleeping in the sacred mosque ...
311: Gabriel came to the Messenger of Allah (may peace be upon him) while he was playing with his playmates ....
D.A. “So, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, the witness has told us that this happened at Mo's house, it happened at the Mosque, and even that it happened when Mo was a little boy. May it please the court, I'd like to make a motion that the testimony of this witness is contradictory and unreliable and should be struck from the record.”
JUDGE: “Motion granted. Bailiff, please escort the witness to the door, toss him out on the sidewalk and throw rocks at him. Let the record show that Malik reported this, but also in al-Iman 1:312 “The rest of the hadith is narrated like that of Thabit. However, some portions have occurred before and some of them have occurred after; some have been added and some deleted.” Case dismissed.
Another part of the story has Mo bartering with god over how much to pray. God told him 50 times a day. He went back down to the sixth floor and Moses told him that was too much. Instead of of insisting that this is the IMMUTABLE WORD OF GOD and not to be questioned, he took the escalator? elevator? Back up and bitched about it. God knocked off five prayers. Mo goes back to Moses. Not good enough. Sends him back. This goes on till they get down to five prayers a day, at which point Mo gets tired of the whole thing and gives up. So that's why muzzies have to pray five times a day.
Everybody seems to have their own version of all this. They all agree that Hell is on the first floor of heaven. Ishaq goes into a lot of detail describing it. Apparently this story was the inspiration for Dante's Inferno, with women hanging by their breasts and stuff like in the picture above. I guess before the internet, you had to get your snuff porn wherever you could find it.