To: Bank of America
Loan Department
Collections
Loan Department
Collections
10/23/2009
From: Uzza
Your Valued Customer
Ancient Ruins
Mesopotamia
Attn Rob Baron,
It is imperative that you forego all interest on my outstanding loans. If you attempt to collect this debt, be advised that I will initiate an armed conflict, otherwise known as 'a war', between myself and your establishment, and will not be held responsible for any fatalities or collateral damage that may result. Only on the condition that you repent will I repay the principal portion of my loan, repenting to take the form of, at the very least, relinquishing any claim to the interest I owe, and kissing my ass.
These actions are taken under the authority of the Holy Quran, Sura 2, Ayat 278-279, which reads in full:
(278) O believers, fear God and forego the interest that is owing, if you really believe.
(279) If you do not, beware of war on the part of God and His Apostle. But if you repent, you shall keep your principal. Oppress none and no one will oppress you.
Thank you for your prompt attention to this matter.
Yours Sincerely,
Uzza, Prophet of God.
Think it's worth a try? Seems to have worked for Mo.
3 comments:
Hi,
I've been trying to leave a comment for while, from my PC, but blogger won't let me. This comment is from husband's Mac, which lives upstairs and I hardly ever use it.
I have succeeded in making others bloggers to make a change so I can post comments from my PC, I wonder if I can twist your arm, too.
The embedded comment form is a problem, for some reason that I ignore. If you change the comment form from embedded to pop-up, I'll be able to post comments from my laptop.
Sorry to trouble you.
Personally, I hate pop-up comments, but OK, I'll do it for you.
Is this better?
Thank for the change. Now I can post comments from any computer!
Post a Comment