Ear Circumcision

In Acts 6-7, Stephen, who was supposed to be waiting on tables, gives a speech, mostly a history lesson about the fugitive murderer Moses, but he hasn't got the knack, he insults his audience, calls them

7:51 “You stiff-necked people! Your hearts and ears are still uncircumcised. You are just like your ancestors: You always resist the Holy Spirit!

Uncircumcised ears! Uncut hearts! Gosh, no wonder they resist The Ghost, if it wants to chop up their ears. Not to mention putting a god shaped hole in their hearts, like the Aztecs. This is where we get the expression give your heart to Jesus, I spose, coz 'give Jesus your foreskin' just doesn't quite cut it.

His speech bombs. Hardly any wonder after he insults their foreskins and blames them for killing Jesus. So they stone him, but do it with big Nerf Stones, because after his last words,

7:60 … When he had said this, he fell asleep.

Now that gets my respect. It takes some serious self control to nod off while you're getting brutally killed: “Ho hum, this stoning to death, so tedious, mmmzzzzz ZZZZ ...” Wow.

Then it tells the story of Saul Paul on the road to DamnAssCuss, and how Peter was such a lousy houseguest, and then it gets to the good stuff, precedent we can follow as a moral guideline. Hooray! What should we do, for example, in a situation like this?

Acts 11:3“You went into the house of uncircumcised men and ate with them.”

Oh, snap, that is a moral quandry isn't it? First of all, before entering a house, always ask if the men there are circumcised. It's simple courtesy, and can save you from later embarrassment. But let's say you are foolish and go in this house. How you find out these men are uncut I'll leave to your imagination, but Peter outlines the problem you face.

Acts 10:28 … “You are well aware that it is against our law for a Jew to associate with or visit a Gentile.

And he explains the reason why it was ok for him to break that law.

10:5 “... I saw a vision.”

The vision had jack to do with foreskins or houses or Jews or gentiles, but there you go. All you have to do is dream something, interpret it to mean you don't have to obey the law, and you're off scot free. Keep that in mind, for traffic court.

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