non-mohammed cartoons

Draw Mohammed Day  post from Laughing in Purgatory.   Not disrespectful, it doesn't show Mohammed at all.  I just thought it was clever.  

Already Drew Mohammed Day

Everybody Draw Mohammed Day: Death threats! Fatwas! South Park censored! Facebook shut down! International incidents! War!

Jeez, this should have come while I was still blogging the Koran. I got stoned and I missed it, but it's right up my alley, so here's my depiction of the prophet.

Original artwork by Rashid al-Din, Persia, 1307.

Nice and respectful, betcha dint expect that, huh? This shouldn't offend anybody but fanatics, and fuck them. The picture was drawn by a muslim, so they can't gripe about it: Art, baby.

Us ignorant infidels mostly don't realize that not all muslims are against drawing old Mo, mainly just the radical Sunnis. Think Southern Baptists in Alabama. The Shiites don't care so much, and there's lots of old Persian prophet pics like this one. All I added was the Shahada that all muslims have to believe in, so they can't gripe about that either. They'd have to go all jihad just over it being a depiction, and this got me to thinking.

The reason they object is because they are mindless fuckheads pictures could lead to idolatry. Slippery slope and all: I can see it, Catholics are always being accused of worshipping Mary, with their statues and medals and shit, so sure, some idiot might put my little picture up his mantle, bow down to it, sacrifice a baby … better not take the chance.

OTOH, some of those submissions (pun) are really, really insulting; they even offend me! I don't think those kind could possibly lead to worshiping the dude. So really, they should be fine with really offensive cartoons, and save their death threats for ones like mine. 

 

Crap. 

 

You just can't win with these guys.

Booming

If you haven't seen this video yet, you should watch it. The good part starts at 1:55.



I've been around the ocean a little, and when I see pictures of "oil booms" my only thought is

"Well, that's fucking pathetic. It couldn't be more obvious some jackoff suit put that there to make it look like he did something while he steals all the disaster money. Boom my ass, you might as well dangle your dick in the water."



Come to find out, I was wrong. Booms can work, if they're used right.

... cue big naive fantasy of efficient well-trained emergency responders who know how to man these things, who leap into action like the (patriotic music here) Heroic Firefighters of 9/11, to stave off fucking Ragnarok ...

Shee-it. I've been seeing lots of pics of the Gulf, but I haven't seen a single one that looks remotely like this:

Have you?

Yeah, we're all gonna fucking die. 

Meet God

God, they say, is the being who created the earth.  Fresh new earth is being created, right now, as you read this, outside in my yard, in the compost pile.  Let me introduce the awesome being who is doing this.



Boy, Cthulhu's got nothing on him for looks, eh?  This Springtail is only one of many such gods.  Don't believe those heretics who say there is only one, here are some others.  You owe your life to them, so show them some respect.

Answer to WorldNetDaily.

"Do you call mocking Jesus comedy?"  


Yes.

a Crime Against Nature

One of these things is a crime against nature. Can you guess which one?

Of course you can. All over the world, from Malawi to North Carolina, all good moral upright people know that those two perverted babes up there are taking a far bigger crap in Mother Nature's face than any of that other stuff. 

Those slackers in Malawi dropped the ball by dropping the 14 year prison sentence against two guys who "went against the order of nature" by having an engagement party.  Lucky for Ma Nature, she still has defenders here in North Carolina. The cops there don't get distracted by trivial things like assault,  they know "the best thing to do" is to arrest the victim along with the attacker because of this law (I'm not making this up):

Offenses against Public Morality and Decency.

§ 14-177.  Crime against nature.
If any person shall commit the crime against nature, with mankind or beast, he shall be punished as a Class I felon. 

Hmmm, I wonder, would it be safe for BP to drill in Carolina?

P.S. the way they define it, for the "crime", a penis or tongue has to enter a vagina or anus. So that still leaves you a lot of options.  Homophobes aren't very imaginative, mmm?